Discouraged and Dismayed

Several years ago my wife and I arrived at a very much anticipated natural horsemanship clinic with Parelli instructor Dave Ellis. As we turned into the ranch driveway, I heard a big ruckus in the trailer. When we stopped to unload the horses, I discovered that my super horse Sam had pawed so much that he'd caught his foot in the hay bag. He extracted himself thankfully, and averted what could have been a bad situation.

I had noticed his pawing before. He had trailered for years and years just fine, had even been to Pagosa Springs and back with little fanfare. But suddenly, from out of nowhere, for no reason at all as the saying goes, he started to get impatient in the trailer. I had failed to notice that I had been letting him step out of the trailer in an anxious demanding state, and then after that, the negative pattern had been established. I was dismayed to say the least.

Horses are masters at outwitting, frustrating and otherwise convincing predators that they should just give up and call it a day. Let's face it, they have survived as long as they have on this planet by outlasting predators of all shapes and sizes. So when my horse began to have behavior that frustrated me, it was no surprise that I wanted to hang up my spurs and call it a day.But I didn't give up. Not that time at least. I have felt like giving up many times over the years.

Imagine what the world would look like if the best scientists in the world threw up their hands. We wouldn't have medicine to cure us, lights to turn on in the living room and cell phones with which to post photos of our favorite horses! If Einstein had given up on his theory of general relativity because he made too many mistakes, where would we all be? If we all gave up as children when we were trying to walk because it was too hard, none of us would ever stand erect.

Believe me, I get it, horsemanship can be frustrating; it can be challenging and sobering and frightening, sometimes all at the same time. But it can also be very rewarding, particularly if we can push through the discomfort to the other side. If we realize that not every day will be a good one, and that tomorrow is another day, then we ease the pressure we put on ourselves and we will enjoy the journey more.

No one ever said that horsemanship would be easy. A day at the beach - that is easy; a day with a horse will sometimes be hard, so hard that we feel like giving up. I encourage you when you feel like giving up, to take a little break. Go back to doing what you love, but only after you have rested, licked and chewed a little and realized that you are only human. You make mistakes. Your horse makes mistakes. And guess what...that's OK. Put one foot in front of the other, walk out to your horse, say you are sorry for whatever you feel that it is you've done, go grab your halter and dare to make more mistakes, for they are inevitable.  It's the only way forward. Your horse will thank you.